Day 6 and a beautiful bronze rainbow is beginning to appear up and down my shoulder. I see the main doc tomorrow to understand where this thing is at. To decide if I need some hardware in there to make these two pieces stay straight or if nature is going to put them back together "good enough for government work".

Sleeping has been tough. I will go for a block of an hour or so, then wake with shooting pain. I re-adjust myself and I'm back to Zzzz's. The toughest part is staying on my back all night as I am a serial 'stomach-sleeper'. Waking up in the AM, the clavicle has 'bonded' a bit you can tell because within a few moves to get out of bed, you can feel it tear a little bit and feel the "chicken bones' start to rattle and rub.

But beyond all this day to day stuff, I've noticed something cool. It's obvious and probably the most "painful" yet. Each day I leave the house through my garage and I instinctively go past my bikes. The Ridley I crashed on that morning hangs, its chain still off the rings. But I walk over and spin the wheel and hear the pawls catch. Click click click click. The obvious thing I notice is how much I miss riding. The delirium tremens of my withdrawls are certainly present. It's hard for me to hear "oh, this will probably be a great 'rest' for you." Please. We all know that life is better when you feel yourself ripping singletrack and flowing. Not the lack of it.

I'll continue to heal and will not be doing anything stupid to rush out and get back on a bike and fall off again only to re-implode this clavicle. I'm just stating for the record how beautiful riding is and how I miss it so. I highly suggest that if you read this and you are about to go on a 'training' ride to try this: Just leave the SRM on your work bench, clip in, and just ride. Go hard if you want or go slow and just spin. Leave your plan alone for the day and just ride and attempt to look around and smile.

I never want this sport to leave me. I never want to leave this sport.